The weather people and I have much different standards as to what makes a heat wave. According to them, a heat wave is what happens when temperatures hit or exceed 90 degrees for three consecutive days. According to me, a heat wave is when I wake up two mornings in a row, covered in sweat, with maybe three hours of sleep to show for it.

I went to bed last night around 11 p.m., got to sleep about one, and woke up every hour until giving up and getting up at 6:30 a.m.

One of my eyes is completely closed, the other barely half open, and I can only hope I’m pouring the coffee into the right orifice.

At nine I have my first appointment with the my new case manager–where I get to spend an hour dwelling on how screwed up I am. And this afternoon I have an appointment with my dentist–where I get to spend an hour reeling in horror due to my dental anxiety.

There’s really not a lot you can do with a day like this. Going back to bed and hiding under a blanket is the most inviting option, but then I’d only postpone the inevitable. Besides, with the heat and humidity being what they are, being under a blanket would be a lot like going to a sweat lodge.

No, with a day like this, the only thing I can do is overdose on caffeine, drop my head, and plow through the tasks ahead of me like a blitzing linebacker. Well that, and hope I can fit some writing in somewhere. As it is, I’m banging this out at 8:15, hoping to get the first draft nailed before I dash off.

I’ll run some errands after meeting with my case manager, because if the morning is screwed anyway I might as well get some of that stuff done. Whenever I get back, I’ll see if I can’t get some new material written. If not, I’ll do revision work until heading to the dentist’s office to cower in the torture chair like an abused chihuahua.

I’m pretty sure that appointment will exterminate all rational thought for the day, but if not, maybe I can fit a little reading in.

There was a purpose to this post beyond simply whining about the shit I have to do, but whatever it was it’s gone now. Lost, adrift in the over-heated, under-caffeinated mind of a man who’d be hiding beneath a blanket right now if he wasn’t convinced he’d run into his dead ancestors under there.